When to Get Your Child Assessed (and When to Wait)

The Parent’s Dilemma

Every parent has moments of worry: “My six-year-old can’t sit still… is that ADHD?” “My daughter still can’t read simple words—should I get her tested?” Or “He melts down over tiny things—do we need to see someone, or will he outgrow it?”

Acting too soon can feel like over-reacting; waiting too long risks missed support, falling grades, or unnecessary emotional pain. This guide walks you through how to decide—step-by-step—whether to book an assessment now or keep monitoring.

1️⃣ Start With a Three-Part Reality Check

Persistence – Has the concern lasted 6+ months?

Yes → Move Toward Assessment

No → Keep Monitoring

Pervasiveness – Does it shows up in 2 or more places (home, school, sport)?

Yes → Move Toward Assessment

No → Keep Monitoring

Impact – Is it limiting learning, friendships, daily life or self-esteem?

Yes → Move Toward Assessment

No → Keep Monitoring

Ticking two or more “Yes” boxes is a strong indicator your child will benefit from professional input now.

Tip: Teachers are invaluable partners. If school staff are raising repeated concerns, schedule a conversation; they see hundreds of children across developmental stages and can benchmark typical vs. atypical.

2️⃣ Know the Critical Ages & Milestones

Early Years (0 – 5)

Speech & Language

No words by 18 m; < 50 words by age 2.5; minimal social pointing/babbling → Red Flags to Act Now

Late talking in bilingual homes with good social engagement → Often Safe to Watch & Wait

Social Interaction

Limited eye contact, little joint attention, repetitive play (hand-flapping, lining toys) → Red Flags to Act Now

Stranger anxiety, shyness in new settings → Often Safe to Watch & Wait

Motor Skills

Not sitting by 9 m, no walking by 18 m, constant toe-walking → Red Flags to Act Now

Awkward running style before age 3 → Often Safe to Watch & Wait

Primary Years (6 – 12)

Academic

Inconsistency despite high effort, ongoing reading/spelling struggles, maths facts never stick → Red Flags to Act Now

Attention/Memory

Daily “off-task,” forgets instructions, loses belongings → Red Flags to Act Now

Behaviour

Persistent impulsivity, aggressive outbursts, difficulty following rules → Red Flags to Act Now

Watch & Wait

Short dips after family move, friendship drama, or illness—should (improve within 3 months with support)

Adolescence (13 – 18)

Red Flags to Act Now

Sharp grade drop without new social activities or workload spike

Risky behaviours: substance use, dangerous driving choices

Social withdrawal, quitting all hobbies, self-harming talk

Watch & Wait

Occasional moodiness tied to exams or friendship issues

Mild rule-testing (later curfew) typical if negotiable

Small decline during Year 9 transition, improving within a term

3️⃣ The Hidden Costs of “Wait-and-See”

  • Learning Gaps Widen: A Year 2 decoding issue may become entrenched reading avoidance by Year 4.

  • Compounding Anxiety: Without clarity, children may internalise struggles as personal failure.

  • Behaviour Labels: Unidentified ADHD can be misread as laziness or non-compliance, harming self-esteem.

  • Lost Funding Windows: Early intervention programs (NDIS Early Childhood Approach, school literacy supports) often require formal documentation.

Conversely, premature assessment can cost time and money if the behaviour is transient. The sweet spot is acting when problems impede daily functioning.

4️⃣ Fast-Track Situations—Skip “Watch & Wait”

  1. Regression – Loss of language, toileting, or social skills previously mastered

  2. Safety Risks – Running into traffic, head-banging, suicidal language

  3. Chronic School Refusal – > 2 weeks absent or distressed daily

  4. Severe Sleep or Eating Disruption – Affecting growth, cognition

  5. Persistent Physical Complaints – Headaches/stomach-aches unexplained medically

In these cases, book with your GP and a psychologist straightaway.

5️⃣ Assessment Pathways & What Happens Next

a. Quick Screening Consult

  • 30–45 min parent consultation

  • Developmental history review + rating scales

  • Outcome: Monitor vs. full assessment recommendation

b. Comprehensive Psycho-educational / Diagnostic Assessment

  1. Parent interview & background forms

  2. Teacher questionnaires (multiple contexts)

  3. Standardised testing (cognitive, academic, social-emotional)

  4. Feedback session & report with tailored strategies for home and school

  5. School liaison to implement accommodations (IEP, extra time, seating)

c. Post-Assessment Supports

  • Therapy (CBT, play-based, social-skills groups)

  • OT, speech pathology, or tutoring referrals

  • NDIS or school-funded interventions

Early clarity drives targeted support—no more guessing what will help.

6️⃣ Practical Tips While You Decide

  • Track behaviours (date, trigger, duration) → gives professionals concrete data

  • Check with teachers or coaches → shows how widespread the issue is

  • Test one strategy for 4 weeks (e.g., visual morning chart)

    • If it works, keep monitoring; if not, consider assessment

  • Explain the process to your child in simple terms:
    “Everyone’s brain works differently; meeting a specialist can help school feel easier.”

✅ Final Thoughts

Choosing to assess is ultimately about optimising your child’s wellbeing and potential.
If challenges are persistent, pervasive, and causing distress, timely assessment brings answers, resources, and relief.

Gayton Psychology specialises in child and adolescent assessments—ADHD, autism, learning and emotional concerns—serving families across Melbourne.

Not sure if it’s time? We offer a free phone consult to help you decide.

📞 0422 651 697  🌐 gaytonpsychology.com  ✉️ katherine@gaytonpsychology.com

Previous
Previous

The Difference Between ADHD and Autism (or Anxiety)

Next
Next

How ADHD Affects Learning, Behaviour, and Friendships